Sunday morning will be an early morning in the Blob household. It’s not because there are people already lining up for the iPhone 5 at the New York flagship store and my husband and I need to dust off our camping gear (side note: as much as I am an Applephile, I do not understand risking one’s health for something one can purchase two weeks after the release date simply by walking into the store). No, Sunday will be an early one because both the Ravens and the Patriots play at 1pm and I need to make sure I’ve secured the room with the bigger TV to watch my Patriots play. I don’t know how marriages survived Sundays before the NFL Sunday Ticket. Actually, DirecTV should get more credit for globalization, as I probably would have had to marry a guy from Boston had the Sunday Ticket not existed.
Related: Love is Not Color Blind
The miracle of the Ticket means that, as a resident of lower Connecticut, not only do I not have to watch the J-E-T-S or the lesser Manning brother, but I also don’t even have to be in the same corner of my house listening to my husband shout things like “Tom Brady loves Uggs!” or “I wanna marry Joe Flacco!” Usually, he does this while shoving his smartphone in my face, showing me that his Baltimore friends have texted him the photo of Tom Brady looking terrified on a waterslide. Next weekend at M&T Bank Stadium will be the first true test of our 2-month-old marriage, but this Sunday should elapse in relative peace since my only interaction with the wRetched Ravens will be checking in on their defense to make sure my fantasy team is intact (after a heroic first week during which I came in first in my office league, my QB Jay Cutler ensured I wouldn’t repeat this week with his 4 picks on Thursday, even though that last pick was a questionable call by the replacement refs).
The Ticket means that I can watch the Pats take on Arizona, a team I got to know last weekend while driving home from my best friend Sally’s Boston wedding, listening to the Seahawks/Cardinals game during the drive (my husband now thinks he’s created a fantasy football monster, as this is my first year playing in several years, and I insisted on listening to the Seahawks game over the Packers/49ers because I needed to check up on Marshawn Lynch). While Larry Fitzgerald continues to be one of the best WR in the game, and will put last week’s claims that the Patriots’ defense is much improved to the test, he’s the bright spot in an otherwise pitch black offense. The only thing Kevin Kolb and Tom Brady have in common is that they both got their breaks when their predecessors went down with injuries. The Cardinals’ defense is decent, but it’s difficult to look at last week’s game against the Seahawks and suggest their squad will be able to keep up with the offensive firepower of the Patriots. The Cardinals are strong at safety with Wilson and Rhodes, but the Patriots simply have too many options with Welker, Hernandez, Gronk and Lloyd. If last week’s performance by Stevan Ridley is indicative of future results, linebacker Daryl Washington will have a hard time containing him. To be honest, I may end up watching the Ravens game with my husband after all, since I don’t expect the Cardinals/Pats game will be particularly interesting after the first half. Of course, now that I’ve written that last sentence we may be in big trouble. Three weeks ago, I told my girlfriends that I’d never broken a bone, and now I’m watching game 2 with a walking boot on my right foot!